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COULD IT ACTUALLY HAPPEN?

Unless you’ve missed the footage of Iliman Ndiaye pulling off a backwards bouncing trick at Everton’s training ground, it’s worth viewing. Through performing a move so nasty that it would have fit right in at a Harlem Globetrotters show game, the skill instantly ended what was meant to be a lighthearted kickabout to finish what had been – up to that point – an illuminating interview about how amateur players can get another opportunity after being dropped from professional academies.

Ndiaye, who featured in non-league games directly before being picked up by Sheffield United at 19, is expertly placed to speak on this topic. “Avoid dwelling on the rejection and one day your luck is going to materialize,” he told a young player immediately prior to deploying said spectacular skill on his teammate, in doing so clearly demonstrating the gulf between Premier League and amateur footballers he had been trying to bridge.

Ndiaye is far from the only professional footballer to take things that little bit too far. Peak Michael Owen happily embarrassing a young shot-stopper in front of a smouldering Neville Southall is undoubtedly the prime example in this specific category – but the former Liverpool man is far from the only offender. Both Christian Eriksen and Shinji Kagawa have reduced toddlers to actual tears with a series of merciless tricks, although it’s considered that the latter was at least motivated by the Japanese player’s social media apologetic post – “difficulty breeds resilience” – and the related tag of #friendship.

Kagawa’s ex-BVB colleagues Lukasz Piszczek, Jakub Blaszczykowski and Nuri Sahin at least had the good grace to suffer a loss against 100 children when the trio lined up during the half-time break of their last appearance for BVB. A Real Madrid XI that contained Cristiano Ronaldo and Xabi Alonso were more competitive when they played against 109 Chinese kids in a comparable scenario. But coming full circle, it’s calculated that only 180 of the 1.5 million boys currently playing competitive youth leagues in England will ever appear in the Premier League, a stark reality for toddlers and teenagers across the country.

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FEATURED STATEMENT

“Football took me but it never deserted me because I never abandoned my dream. I went from location to location. The devotion to the game carries you. I couldn’t always see where it was taking me. But today I have the solution” – head coach Veljko Paunovic takes time out from his planning to share his career.

FAN FEEDBACK

“Nice to hear that Kevin Mac Allister won’t be excluded by Argentina. Hopefully, if he travels to the international competition next year, he’ll research how to navigate the venue locations – wouldn’t want him to end up lost in New York” – James Humphries.

“Sources state that 1,024 players in the Turkish league have been suspended due to alleged involvement in a gambling controversy. It would be wonderful if that number could be bumped up to the same level of usual detail-orientation associated with Football Daily – that is, 1,057 readers. By my calculation, that’s about 33 more detail-oriented individuals. If I agree to be excluded from playing professionally in Turkey (not much of a loss at my age and, um, ability), are there 32 more folks willing to participate in my quest for symmetry?” – Mike Wilner.

“As a frequent consumer and Florida resident, can I proactively complain about the coming period of published letters about which highway one uses to get to various locations in your homeland? I mean, I was delayed in congestion on I-4 at 2am on a Tuesday night driving through Orlando once, but that’s the entire tale. There’s no rewarding moral to the tale. (I-4 connects Tampa on the Gulf Coast to Daytona on the Atlantic via Orlando/Walt Disney World, and can have traffic issues at any time)” – Rasteen Nowroozi.

“Concerning Wythenshawe FC, I recollect many years ago playing for a Sunday, very social side, Turnpike Lane Hibs, on Clapham Common. One morning a bloke known as ‘Danny’ turned up to play. I have no idea who recruited him. Reportedly he was an actor; he had a useful left foot. (Yes, Daniel Day-Lewis)” – Jason Steger.

“Together with some associates and companions, I play a game of football each Friday afternoon. Our most senior member is approaching eighty, while the least experienced are in their young adulthood. To ensure a enjoyable experience for everyone, we have a basic guideline regarding the quality of player: you can be speedy or technical, but preferably not both. We sometimes have players who disregard this principle, but usually succeed in bringing them to our standard over time” – Lars Esbjerg.